WWE: A Few Observations


First of all, let me make it VERY clear that I am NOT a fan of WWE. DH loves it as a stress reliever for him, and that’s all fine and dandy. Since he IS a fan, I *get* to watch it or listen to it from another room every single Monday night. Therefore, I posit the following observations.

The Women–I predict that they will have a much shorter shelf life than the “wrestlers” on the show due to the fact that no matter how much plastic surgery they have, they will be tossed aside when they reach that not-so-magic old lady age. That would be about 35 in Hollywood years.

The Wrestlers–This is a term I use VERY loosely since I went to actual wrestling matches in high school, watched actual wrestlers, and found it to be a fascinating sport. WWE bears zero resemblance to what I saw then.

WWE Champion John Cena presents the 2.6 millio...

WWE Champion John Cena presents the 2.6 millionth card received by ASY group A Million Thanks to Army 1st Lt. Shannon Terry as part of the WWE’s “Tribute to the Troops” tour of Iraq. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The Belt–Is it big enough?

The Clothes–Men in panties. Um. Okay.

The Dude Pretending To Be Irish–I’ve heard of tanning beds, but where on earth do you find a whitening bed? This guy’s skin is preternaturally white. I mean really–is there a whitening bed somewhere that I don’t know about? And what about that flaming red hair? I’m pretty sure it’s not what God gave him.

Hulk Hogan joined TNA in late 2009.

Hulk Hogan joined TNA in late 2009. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The Waxing–How on earth did they talk these guys into waxing their ENTIRE bodies?

THE STAR–Currently THE STAR seems to be John Cena. Just how does one achieve that lofty status? I remember Hulk Hogan and Rowdy Roddy Piper,  but seriously that’s about it. I know those guys are too old to play with the young boys now, but what warrants the crown?

The Announcer(s)–The only qualification I can see for this position is to be VERY loud and annoying.

So there you have it–my few observations on WWE. I know I left many players out, but this will do for now.

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