Deliver Me from Wal-Mart


We went to Wal-Mart today, an activity I try to avoid at all costs. I plead temporary insanity for going today.

Sometimes when DH goes he will text me that the store is full of mouth-breathers. I don’t think it was full of them today, but we definitely encountered a cluster of them. While on the canned vegetable aisle, we came to a complete halt. Apparently we were jammed up behind a three-buggy one family pile up. I seriously wished for a horn on my buggy at that point.

Check out was a particular joy. First of all, everybody in line must have been laying in supplies for the winter considering the volume of groceries in each buggy. The first line we got in wasn’t moving at all, so being the line-jumper that I am, we switched to another line.

Oh, I forgot to tell you that there was this one kid there with a hairdo that probably took him 2 hours to perfect. I almost asked him if I could take a picture of it. It was parted in a “V” in the back and then swept straight up and curled over. I was fascinated by it. It looked sorta like Hugh Jackman’s Wolverine hairdo. Or Marcel on Top Chef. He was smooth.

Our checkout girl was a particular joy. As she scanned our items, she would comment on almost every one in some unintelligible mumble that I guess I was supposed to respond to. Mostly I just nodded and said, “Yes.” She made some remark about the Smucker’s Natural Peanut Butter, but all I heard was “I’m sure it tastes delicious anyway.” Um, okay.

She examined several other products like she had never seen them before. Really? Come on! Just scan and put it in the bag, please.

After an interminable amount of time, we finally got our ticket out of there. I really appreciate that DH goes most of the time and I don’t have to deal with the People of Wal-Mart on a regular basis.

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4 Responses to Deliver Me from Wal-Mart

  1. Eklctc says:

    What an entertaining blog. I, shamefully, still shop at Wal-Mart. I know I should do better but they get me every time. I buy the items on special from other grocery stores but resort to Wal-Mart for all other food and hygiene items that I cannot find on sale. I stick to those items, though, and stay away from clothing, accessories, and what not. I also try to go during times when there are less people shopping and I can have less interaction with clerks.

    Thanks for sharing.

  2. rolandmann says:

    I shop there far too much.
    Have you seen this video? It’s a hoot!

  3. BisonWoman says:

    Yes, I have see that. It makes you wonder what people think before they walk out the door, doesn’t it?

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